My brother got a job twisting licorice. He was fired for being left handed. Now there is a recall.

I got a bag of the defective licorice and couldn’t tell the difference, but I chew backwards.

Seriously, licorice has a right hand twist. I’ll bet you didn’t know that. Next time you are at the store, take a look. Maybe you’ll find a rare bag from the batch my brother made.

I should put a little flag thingie on this post to tease the Canadians.

Soon, I’ll tease the British because they talk funny and the Baptists because their flag looks like a cross between a radiation warning and a scuba diver flag. Maybe it’s for radioactive scuba divers.

The Marines have a flag, but don’t tease them.

I ran out of ink so I use brain juice.

Now, all I can write are subliminal messages.

Pay close attention.

Someday, this could be you.

I don’t have thumb prints.

I have thumb tacks. They’re harder to scan.